I am an enigmatic figure, often seen lifting weights and/or blasting beats. I have been known to rearrange bookshelves, making them less alphabetical and more aesthetic pleasing. I translate ancient manuscripts from the original Hebrew and Greek. I write semi interesting blog posts. I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I skip coffee three days in a row.
I fascinate children with my deft marimba playing. I can pilot small aircrafts with minimal supervision, and I enjoy a good sunburn. As a professional recording artist I specialize in New Age instrumental music. I am an expert in sarcasm, a veteran in landscaping, and an outlaw in Pigeon Forge.
Once, after falling asleep at the wheel, I did donuts on the interstate in the path of oncoming semis before continuing on to my destination. I play an 8 string guitar. I have preached on the streets of the Bronx, and I am undefeated in political elections. When I go to the beach, dolphins celebrate my arrival. I always finish my test first. On Tuesdays, after school, I consume large quantities of Buffalo Wild Wings.
I am an abstract sequential, a concrete random, and a recovering hypocondriac. Challies sometimes links to my blog. I have won giant stuffed animals at Sea World. My house smells of various Glade Air fresheners and I have many paperback books. I batted 1.000 for an entire season and completed an unassisted triple play. My aggressive driving skills have saved me more than 15% on car insurance. Parents trust me.
I dodge, I duck, I dip, I dive, and my bills are all paid on time. I always play last at recitals. I’ve been accused of smuggling drugs into Quebec and shoplifting in Spain. I’ve offended countless passengers on the Paris Metro and gorged myself on Argentine steak. I successfully messed with Texas. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but you’ll have to dig through my archives to find it.
With that out of the way, click here to find out about this blog.